Seeking to know the history of your potential partner’s past relationships can be a big step towards forming a lasting relationship with him or her. However, the process can be tricky if you do not know the right way to execute it. First, you need to understand how your partner feels about sharing his or her dating history. This article explores a few tips that can help you find out someone’s dating history without drawing any negative emotions.
1. Social Media
Social media platforms such as dating sites offer vital information about the dating history of someone. The platforms allow you to access the information that someone has shared on his profile, including relationship issues. To access relationship information of someone on a social media platform, you can follow the following steps:
• Log into your social media account and type the name of the person in the search bar. The name of the person will pop up once you click “Search.” Since some people use pseudonyms, you will need to know how the person calls him or herself on the platform.
• Click on the name of the person to access his or her profile.
• Check his relationship status to see if he or she is single, engaged, dating, married, or divorced.
• Access any pictures the person has uploaded and those he or she has been tagged in if any. The pictures may offer a clue about any past relationships.
You can also find out how to view hidden dating profiles, this will help you determine someone’s dating history online as well.
2. Elicitation
Elicitation involves seeking information from someone without asking direct questions. Some of the strategies you can apply to ensure smooth elicitation include:
• Flattery
• Assumption
• Attribution
Flattery involves eliciting information from the person by talking about his or her strengths. Since many people feel proud whenever their strengths are mentioned, this is likely to trigger your partner’s ego and open the avenues for information. You can flatter someone by simply saying, “Probably, you have had it difficult dealing with men because of your sexy figure.” If your guess is true, this is the time she will immediately say the truth about her past.
An assumption can easily elicit information from someone without drawing any negative emotions. It involves asking questions indirectly. For instance, you may say, “Handsome men like you are players.” He might respond by saying, “But I have always been faithful in the past.” This will give you a clue that he was once in a relationship.
Attribution involves telling the person what you have had people say about him but on a light note. You may apply this strategy together with flattery for better results. You can say, “I guess you love your girlfriend very much. I always see the two of you together.” At this point, he may think that you already know his ex-girlfriend; hence, he has to tell the truth.
3. Probing
Probing your potential partner involves asking him subtle questions about his past relationships. To successfully apply this strategy, you need to know the most ideal circumstances when to ask certain questions. Probing should be gradual, and it should involve patience. Also, avoid being too serious when asking questions. Being too serious may make the person think that you are stalking him or her. Ask the questions on a light note and in a friendly way.
4. Potential Partner’s Family Members
Striking a close relationship with parents and siblings of your potential partner creates an opportunity to access information about his or her past relationships. While interacting with the family members of your partner, stories about him or her may come up naturally. For instance, when your boyfriend’s mother sees you, she may remark, “You got it right this time around my son.” Though not detailed, the remark may give you a clue that your boyfriend was once in a relationship that his family did not like.
Additionally, your partner’s parent may say, “You are my daughter’s first boyfriend. I will be so unhappy to learn that you have disappointed her? This statement clearly implies that you partner has never been into any relationship known to her family.
5. Direct Interrogation
Characters differ. While some people may want to be secretive about their dating history, others are open to sharing their stories. Some see this as an opportunity to let you know their likes and dislikes. They may want you to know the things they did not like about their ex-partners, which made it difficult for the relationship to work. They believe that you will be able to learn from their stories and do what they like to maintain a relationship with them.
Bottom Line
Knowing about your partner’s past relationships may not be a one-day event. Rather, it is a process that involves time. Since the process can easily be interpreted by your partner to mean stalking, you need to undertake it with a lot of caution for better results.
